Selections from ten years of New York Times columns Rolling with the Punches at Any Stage of Life My last column: if there is no such thing as a life without change, why does it feel so difficult? Disclosing Mental Health Issues at Work? Some are glad – but others regret – telling a boss about psychological problems. Estate Planning is More Than the Will Trusted friends and family members need to know how to get access to bank and online accounts, and even your home after you die. Two Decades of Fraud Almost two thousand victims and nearly $26 million lost. How did it go on for so long? In Life and Business, Learning to be Ethical Research shows most of think we’re more ethical than we really are. An Alternative to Giving Up the Car Keys There’s a choice for older drivers between stopping driving and ignoring problems. Dealing with a Client who Calls and Calls… Listen to your gut – if it tells you a client is going to be hellish to work with, run the other way. Here are some telltale signs. After a Tragedy, the Best Ways People Can Help It has become all too common – a mass tragedy happens and people rush to donate money to the families. Is there a better way to show our sympathy? Complaining is Necessary – But Learn to Do It Right Some people want a complaint-free world. Not me. You’ve Been Doing a Fantastic Job, Just One Thing… Too much praise can cloud feedback – the point is to help someone do better, not make them feel better. Redefining Success and Celebrating the Ordinary Why do we feel we all have to be so special? When did the term ordinary become so feared? In a Data-Heavy Society, Being Defined By the Numbers These days, it’s way too easy use Facebook ‘likes’, Twitter followers and other metrics to measure success. Tiptoeing Out of One’s Comfort Zone (and Back In) Learning to find the optimal balance of ‘productive discomfort. Is Mandating Volunteering a Good Idea? Schools, temples, churches often require children to volunteer. It can have an impact, but has to have meaning and follow-up. For the Dishwasher’s Sake, Easy on the Detergent Most of use way too much soap in our dishwashers and washing machines. Here’s the amount repairmen say you should use. If Not Passion for the Job, at Least Warm Feelings Are we overselling the idea that you need to absolutely love what you do? Winners Never Quit? Well, Yes They Do. Sometimes quitting is the right thing to do. It just has to be for the right reasons and in the right way. How We Think about Mistakes Even though we’re taught young that we learn from mistakes, as we get older, most of fear and dread making mistakes. But we’re doing ourselves a grave disservice. Too Busy to Notice You’re Too Busy? Being busy seems to be a badge of honor. But why is that? The Dangers of Regifting Fifty-two percent of people admit to regifting. It’s acceptable – just make sure it’s new. And remove all incriminating evidence.